Tuesday, August 4, 2009


The house is coming together. I guess. I have been lazy this last week, both in house work and updates. My apologies.

I'll post some picture updates this week, as rooms come together (for good), but for now, my update is Crazy Jeff Doors oriented.

He hasn't shown up for a week. It's the best. He called me yesterday, while I was at work, and left a message for me. I don't have it, so I cannot transcribe it word for word, but I will do my best to give you the gist of it. Here is the gist of it:

He has been off of his medication. He got medication yesterday.



He is crazy, this has been documented here. Literally crazy. Text book crazy. I was unaware that his craziness was at the 'need medication' level. Astounding. I fear that his enormous companion is dead. More on this as it develops.

Last week, he started to put up some crown moulding in the dining room. I had purchased hundreds of feet of the moulding and corner pieces so I could install it myself. Since Jeff was around, I asked him to start things. Big mistake.

One day last week, the only day he showed up, I listened to a voicemail he left while I was driving home. In it he described how he cannot use the MDF moulding that I purchased because he is, "a carpenter. Carpenters use wood."

When I got home, he told me the same thing and I told him that I would gladly install it myself. Below is his attempt. Judging by the look of things, he would not be able to put up wood crown either. The corner he attempted, and then abandoned, is terribly misaligned:

The only problem with my idea? The corners in each room are not square. Thus, the generally square corner pieces I purchased, to avoid crazy mitre cuts, will not work. They have huge gaps between them and the walls, and thus, the walls will be painted, the moulding returned, and the house crownless. I lack the skill to put up crown without cheating by using corner pieces. Lame.

Another Crazy Jeff update: I found his last name. It is Gagne. I spoke with the man who referred him to me, the man who took care of my sod, and he let me know. He also told me that he does a background check on everyone who works for him, and informed me that Jeff has two DUIs from 9 years ago, and that was it. I suspected as much, as Jeff doesn't drive, nor does he drink any longer.

I still searched around on the internet for a few minutes, looking for more recent transgressions, but there are none. Jeff, as usual, was a terrible manager of my expectations and led me to believe that he molested a child just two weeks ago. Instead, it was a crime or two from the 90s.

For your pleasure, I took some guerrilla style photos of Jeff and the Behemoth the last time they were at the house. Enjoy:


America is tops. It produces a lot of pharmaceuticals.

And her:

And her ham arm:

I will try to get some better images of them, but this was the best i could do without them noticing.

Lastly, we don't have cable. I explained this awhile ago. Since that decision, I have been trying to find ways to make the most of my huge TV, despite the lack of HD programming. Late last week, I found a fantastic little program that turns my computer into a virtual server for Hulu, Netflix and other such streaming video sites. Here's how it works:

The wireless network in my house talks to my desktop computer, and my Playstation 3. My desktop computer sends the Netflix, Hulu and other site information to my ps3. My ps3 displays said information. We choose from hundreds of movies, shows, etc. My ps3 sends the request to my desktop, which sends the request to the site. The site then serves up the information to my desktop, which sends it to my ps3, which sends it to my TV. It is just awesome.

Images to come this week.

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